Ann M. Martin is a genius

When I was a kid, I wanted to be a babysitter more than a rich kid wants a pony. Specifically, I wanted to be a member of the Babysitter's Club, a fictional organization of 13-year old, fully certified babysitters. At 9, age 13 seemed so old and responsible, but by the time I was 13, I knew I wouldn't have put me in charge of anything living. Mainly because my babysitting tactic, for a long time, was to do everything fun and amusing that I could think of day one, then get irritated because children, as it turns out, need to be entertained and cared for every day. Who knew?

I have, since then, gained more patience for youngsters. I have also learned not to overexert myself on day one and to save some fun things for later, because there always will be a later. One thing I did love about what the Babysitter's Club babysitters brought to the table were the Kid Kits. Kid Kits were these sweet little boxes that the Babysitters filled with stickers, coloring books, crayons, and all kinds of wonderful kid-entertaining things. I imagine there had to have been some glitter, or there would have been an inevitable coup of some kind.

Today, I learned how much smarter than me these made-up teenagers were. I was called in to substitute for a middle school parapro, which meant following different classes throughout the day. As if that wasn't complicated enough, today was also field trip day for one of the grades, so some of the teachers were out. At one point, I led a class (a LARGE class, at that) into a room, seated them, and stood in horror as I realized there wasn't a teacher in the room already! Cue hitchcock-style scream. Of course, being alone in a room with students is not something that is new to me. As a substitute (And even during my student teaching sometimes), I find myself flying solo all the time. In fact, today would have been the first day that I wasn't filling in for the primary teacher. But here's what was severely lacking in this scenario: A lesson plan of any kind.

We were actually supposed to be in the computer room, but the computer room was occupied by another class, so we were told to go to this classroom, and..... And what? "And what?" is exactly the question I was met with, as I stared at 30-ish seventh graders, who were being relatively quiet as they waited for guidance. And none came.

It was eventually decided that they would present their technology projects, which, in a room lacking of personal computers meant that they would be reading from printed powerpoint slides and doing their very best to be quiet and listen respectfully. Uh-huh.

And so I refer back to the genius of Ann M. Martin, writer of the phenomenal series that spurred a not-so-phenomenal movie, and an ehhh spinoff series: Kid Kits. Or something more grown-up and professional sounding, but essentially, yes, Kid Kits. You see, I'd like to gather a handful of lesson plans, varying in time length, for the not-so-unlikely occasion that I find myself standing in front of eager students (whose attention spans are drifting by the second) with nothing in hand. And that is where you, the reader (you know, all five or so of you, am I right?) come in. Throw out some lesson plan ideas for me to use! Try to make them engaging, but educational, without making them feel too much like they're in "school." I know they are in school, but what right does a substitute have to teach them anything? This is why it needs to be sneaky. I will probably work best with English/Language Arts-related topics, but feel free to throw anything in. Current events could work well too. Just so they are doing something, and the class period doesn't turn into heads up seven up. I don't mind if I have to print anything out; I'll probably print out like 10 copies and have them do the stuff in groups or something. One more thing! If these could be altered to fit as many ages as possible, it would be best; I'm on the list for primary-high school, so it's anybody's guess where I'll be!

Anyway, here's my short-list; feel free to add to it!!

5-10 minutes:

Brainteasters, etc.

-Have students brainstorm as many uses as they can for simple items: brick, blanket, fork, box... If time allows, discuss some of the students' answers

-Droodles (clicky): Look at these shapes and see what students think they are. Spend a few minutes jotting down everything they think the things could possibly be. Talk about ideas.

-Circle madness: Have a paper full of circles (students can draw them, or they can be pre-printed). Have students draw on circles to create different things, count how many each student comes up with.

-The famous farmhouse: Draw that shape, you know the one (a box with an X in the middle and a triangle on top of it. It looks like a farmhouse to me... Challenge students to recreate the shape without picking up their pencil, tracing lines, or crossing lines.

15-20 minutes: (or more, really)

Writing!!

-Have students draw inspiration from Lynda Barry's What it is (right here) and write short stories, poems, plays...

-There's always this amazing book, that supplies the first sentence of a story FOR the writer.

-The zombie exercise is always a hit. Basically, students visualize a room in their house, look to the left from a particular spot, imagine themselves picking up the first thing they find, and use it as a weapon in the zombie apocalypse. Usually more of a hit with boys, but girls have fun with it too.

Quick Skit!

-Act out characters of scenes from books and have the class guess who it is.

20-30 minutes

An infinite amount of writing prompts!

Here are some of my favorites, and students can share their pieces with time left over

-Think of your favorite song and a memory you have attached to that song. Write that memory as a scene in a story.

-create a scene: Students brainstorm different methods of travel (anything from submarine to bicycle to spaceship; literally nothing (well... not nothing is off-limits)), then answer a series of questions about the main character (who are they, why are they traveling, where are they going) and write a scene from this information

-aaackk I'm drawing a blank on writing prompts. Help me out, here! Natasha, I'm looking at youuu!!

There's always time for poetry!

-The Jabberwocky lesson plan: Students read Jabberwocky in groups and try to decipher some of the crazy words and say what they think the poem means

A full class period

-What makes a good story: Discuss some elements of stories, pausing to discuss the "hook" in general. Have students pick books from a bookshelf (hopefully there is one!) and read the first sentences of their books. Rate the sentences 1-5 stars, 1 being "I don't want to read this book now," 5 being "I HAVE to find out what happens in this book!" Then have some students read their sentences, discussing what would make them better or why they are great the way they are. Students brainstorm their own first sentences, pick one, and WRITE!

-test-taking strategies: Talk about how to do well on a test. Give the sample test (something I got in class last year) and see how well students can do on a test -- one that basically takes itself! Then discuss the answers and how you can use a test to help you.

-It's always possible to stretch out some of the other things on above lists...

So that's what I have so far. I'm sure if I thought long enough I could come up with more. Most teachers do have a plan for the sub, but in case I'm faced with the unthinkable again I want to be prepared! So... Get your ideas ready.... set..... GO! Let me hear it!